Best Onscreen Other Half: Chloe (2009)
Liam Neeson is : David, husband under suspicion.
In this remake of saucy French thriller Nathalie... , Neeson's character cops off with hot call girl pl🌟ayed by Amanda Seౠyfried. And it's his wife (Julianne Moore) who sets up the escort to try to catch him out after getting the feeling that he may be a deceitful adulterer.
How cool is that? His missus sets him up with Amanda Seyfried! And - spoiler alert - cops off with her herself♌! That's the kind of attitude that could convince us to settle down.
It's out th🙈🥀is week, so you can find out for yourself if it ends happily.
Worst Onscreen Other Half: The Other Man (2008)
Liam Neeson is : Peter, cuckolded husband.
The tables are turned on in this little-seen 🌜dull-fest.
Neeson plays a husband who suspects his ball and ch🍰ain (Laura Linney) of being unfaithful (with la🦩tin lothario Antonio Banderas, of all people).
The🅘 talent is criminally wasted, and it closes with a jarringly-clunky twist.
And Amanda Seyfried doesn't get naked once.
Best Villain: Batman Begins (2005)
Liam Neeson is : Henri Ducard, shady Bruce Wayne helper.
In Nolan's franchise shake⛎-up, Neeson takes on the role of Henr☂i Ducard, who introduces the future-Batman to the League of Shadows and its mysterious leader Ra's al Ghul.
After being injured during Bruce Wayne's explosive escape, Neeson reappears for the kind of killer twist that so rarely makes it into a big blockbu🍎ster without spoilers having bee🔯n splattered all over the net.
Worst Villain: The Haunting (1999)
Liam Neeson is : Dr. David🍰 Marrow, morally dubious psychologist.
In Jan de Bont's retelling of Shirley Jackson's novel The Haunting of Hill House (already made into a perfectly effective chiller by Robert Wise in 1963), any semblance of atmosphere is destroyed by the presence of frighteningly-bad CGI and implausible characters.
Neeson's Dr. Marrow sets up the whole thing, as he's trying to study psychological reactions to fear (sadly he won't find any of that here). Neeson (and the rest of the🀅 half-decent cast) can be grateful that the movie h𒀰as been utterly forgotten.
Best Beard: Clash of the Titans (2010)
Liam Neeson is : Zeus, Mount Olympus-dwelling deity.
To play Zeus, King of the Greek god♌s, in Louis Leterrier's epic remake, Liam displays a suitably majestic beard. The fact that Zeus wears a suit of armour may not be to everyone's taste, but no-one can dispute the godliness of his monumental chin-rug.
By Zeus' beard, it's awesome.
Worst Beard: Star Wars: Episode I - The Phantom Menace (1999)
Liam Neeson is : Qui-Gon Jinn, Jedi Knight and Obi-Wan mentor.
Liam's fluffy facial fuzz lacked the gravitas a noblಌe Jedi needs. We've got a feeling even Yod𝔍a could grow a better once, if he concentrated hard enough.
Thankfully the awful mullet he wore distracted attention away from his chin. That, and the fact tha🍸t Obi✃-Wan's was ginger.
Best Historical Figure: Schindler's List (1993)
Liam Neeson is : Oskar Schindler, Nazi-riling factory owner.
Neeson received an Oscar nom for𝓀 his performance in Steven Spielberg's gut-wrencဣhing holocaust drama.
Commands the kind of respect due to a real-life figure who saved oveꦓr a thousand Jews from Nazi persecution.
Worst Historical Figure: Rob Roy (1995)
Liam Neeson is : Robert Roy MacGregor, William Wallace wannabe.
Neeson does his best but can't stop the movie being desperately dull. His Braveheart-lite hero takes on Tim Roth's campy villain iཧn this rambling period drama, and there's not nearly enough swashbuckling to balance out the boring bits.
While we watched it all we wanted was - all together now ꦰ- "Freedoooooooooom!"
Best Badass: Taken (2008)
Liam Neeson is : Bryan Mills, a kidnapper's worst nightmare.
It's impossible to imagine anyone other than Neeson as the no-nonsense ex-CIA agent who heads to Paris to crack some heads when his daughter is kidnap🗹ped.
Neeson invests Pierre Morel's ridiculous, '80s throwback actioner with a muscular hero who could convince as Jason Bour𝔉ne's pop.
Worst Badass: Next of Kin (1989)
Liam Neeson is : Briar Gates, vengeance-seeking brother.
Despite featuring Neeson, Patrick Swayze and Bill Paxton as surely cinema's mo😼st awesome triumvirate of brothers, this workmanlike thriller never really get off the ground.
Neeson ducks out before the end when his char꧅acter is stabbed to death, leaving sensible sibling Swayze to solve the myster༺y.
Best Religious Allegory: The Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe (2005)
Liam Neeson is : Aslan, Narnia's feline ruler.
Liam lends his dulcet tones to Aslan the lion, a t♌hinly-veiled Jesus-metaphor in this adaptation of C.S. Lewis's classic of children's literature. If there's an actor in Hollywood manly enough to voice a lion, it's definitely Neeson.
Christ-allegory Aslan resurrects after being put to death by the White Witch (Tilda Swinton), ensuring Neeson's place in Prince Caspian and beyond.
Worst Religious Allegory: Seraphim Falls (2006)
Liam Neeson is : Colonel Morsman Carver, grudge-ho♚lding confede൩rate officer.
Liam Neeson goes head to head with Pierce Brosnan. The Emerald Isle's biggest stars play hunter and prey respectively in this Civil War western.
The title seems to refer to the fictional setting, but also hints at the story of a fallen angel. Things get really heavy handed when when the men receive a dream-like vis♎itation Anjelica H🃏uston as Louise C. Fair (say it back to yourself).
Best Father Figure: Kingdom of Heaven (2005)
Liam Neeson is : Baron Godfrey of Ibelin, Medieval crusader.
Neeson's Baron Godfrey takes his estranged, illegitimate son, Balian (Orlando Bloom), under his manly wing, and makes sure he knights him before croaking. Makes a good fatherly impact with lim𓄧ited screentime.
And not many dads can stop their kids from whinging with the anecdo🍸te: "I once fought for two days with an arrow through my tes𝄹ticle."
Worst Father Figure: Love Actually (2003)
Liam Neeson is : Daniel, Claudia Schiffer-snaring widower.
As one part of Richard Curtis' romantic carousel, Neeson plays the widower who is lef♎t as the sole carer of stepson Sam (Thomaജs Sangster).
Neeson's father fi♒gures are at their best when teaching their kids how to dispense an ass-whupping or going postal to save kidna༒pped offspring.
They're less cool when negotiating the awkward exp🎐lanation of the birds and the bees to lusty ten-year-olds.
Best Accent: Michael Collins (1996)
Liam Neeson is : Michael Collins, the eponymous Iris🃏h re♛volutionary.
Neeson clearly graduatღed from the Sean Connery school of accents. Thankfully this role enabled him to use his natural Irish brogue to 𝄹full and convincing effect, and he imbues the character with an authentic weightiness.
Worst Accent: K-19: The Widowmaker (2002)
Liam Neeson is : Captain Mikhailℱ Polenin, semi-fictional naval officer.
Under the direction of a pre- Hurt Locker Bigelow, Liam failed to heed the most important lesson at the Sean Connery school: do not, under any circumstances,🌳 attempt a Russian accent, especially on board a submarine.
Thankfully Harrison Ford's awful Ruskie intoning takes some of the🔴 g⛦lare of Neeson.
